And Then They Were Wed

The big weekend finally arrived. All week we (groom's family) put stuff on piles "for the wedding". When we arrived at the church/reception hall I realized that the bride's family was probably piling things and planning things for a lot longer than we were!

When and if we ever have a daughter's wedding I have a feeling this planning thing will need more than one page in my calendar.

We did get to help with the set-up....well some of us 😀 They did actually work

but this particular photo doesn't seem that way.

Did I ever mention that we are twins? Not look-alike kind, but born-on-the-same-day kind.

Last minute advice from mom? Actually don't know what we were saying.

In the evening we had the rehearsal dinner. I was so worried that I would forget something important., but so far I don't think I did, so I think I won't worry about it anymore.

We had some diet considerations to consider as a number of the attendees were gluten-intolerant, but the GF brownies actually turned out OK.  I made subs for the supper along with fruit, cookies and ice cream. The subs were made the "right" way--hard salami, capricola ham and provolone cheese--family opinion here.

The table decorations were all in place when we came back in the evening--very nice.

Now --no hands in your pockets--and smile!

Three sisters about to gain another sister--they like this adding -girls- to- the -family thing.

They get this benefit of:

Parker quite happy to be out of his seat after their long drive.

Caught her smiling!

Oh wow! look at what 5-1/2 years can do!

Sisters! they were good for you Ben.

I really like this one!

Again, time flies and all that!

This time we weren't freezing though.

Gotta wait till the official pics come out for the ones with the bridal party.

This is the bride and groom from 5-1/2 years ago, wonder if it will be that long till the next wedding?

Then we needed to pay the "bride price"--Jana's three brothers always told Ben that since she is their only sister she is very valuable and they won't let her go easily-- they figured she was at least worth

"10 cows"

Last week Ben called me and said, "Mom, they just don't have any cows at the stores around here, can you help me?"

I was happy to!

So at the end of the reception when they were saying their farewells, Ben started with his story--"There is one piece of business that needs to happen yet."

I could see the father-of-the-bride's face, he was confused--so were the brothers.

It was a good laugh as Ben counted out his ten cows and set them in a row.

The last piece of paper and they were on their way.

Since Ben has been living on his own for the past year, it doesn't leave as big of a hole in our family. DH and I get to claim our master bedroom again since there are only two boys in the house anymore.

Hmm wonder if I should re-decorate?

Not sure what I am going to start, now that the Wedding is over.

VBS, Birthdays, and Respect

This week started last Saturday, DH and I were in charge of the church's community cook-out. That is--this was our 3rd year on the committee and it was our turn to take responsibility. It was stressful until it started, then it was fun. We served about 170 people...not really that many, but considering you don't really know how many people are going to show up--you prep for a few more than last year and be thankful that the local grocery store is open on a Saturday evening.

Then we had a week of VBS, this year I only served as a substitute. Hope,Joe and Zeke each had jobs throughout the week. The teacher that worked the hardest was the lady who had the craft station for the older kids. She had them doing the two above crafts. I think I will do a few of those light houses and put them on the front porch. The candle is coffee and cinnamon, I didn't burn it yet cause this week was just too warm to think of burning candles.

Shekinah turned 7! Today I signed up for a store courtesy card and the clerk asked if anyone in our household is 60 or older and she piped up, " I'm 7!"  I shushed her and after we got outside she said, "but that lady wanted to know if anyone in our house was 6  or older!"

I've been pondering things lately ...so  at what point are our children  able to make big decisions? I always sort of thought it was an easy stage, they sort of grow up, you give them more decisions- do you want to do your homework first or set the table?

 They get their first job- do you want to apply here or there? 

Then their own bank accounts 

Can you balance your own accounts?

Do you need a debit card?

Easy and gradual right?

So when...well like, when your kid is young you might have a rule that they need to fix their bed, or that they need to eat breakfast or put away their clothes....You tell them and they do it, if they don't, 

usually the force of your displeasure has them taking care of things.

But at what age do you let them just ...I don't know....go to bed in a messy bed, go to work hungry, not brush their teeth, not study for that final exam, not bother to balance their check book...forget to go to work?

Where are the lines?

What if natural consequences don't seem to bother them?

How do you make it matter?

There is a point when you can't make your child do things...it actually starts when they are quite young. You might think you can make a child eat something or 

you can make them be potty trained....but....

it really comes down to relationship

that bond you build from day #1

The connection that builds from repeatedly feeling good when mommy's eyes light up when she looks at me and daddy's voice has that special sound when he talks to me.

(I'm enjoying watching Hudson start to interact with us, but his strongest connection is with his mommy)

That strong connection with his parents is what gives a child his concept of God and allows a child to absorb his parents ethics. Whatever daddy says is the truth! Whatever mommy gives me is good!

That is the connection that gives the child the trust he needs to usually try some new foods and eventually want to be potty trained.

Respect comes in there too....you do not demand respect from a child, you earn it...yes I know you can require a child to use respectful words, but you can not make them respect you.

Think about the people you know...why do your respect them..or not?

Is it because they demanded it?

So back to absorbing parents ethics and following rules...is it worth WW III over fixing your bed?

I think not

What about taking care of your physical body?

I don't know

Which laws of safety are negotiable?

Which of our ethics are engraved in stone?

(Just for clarity, not all of these things are things we have experienced--just some ponderings)

Our "Exciting" Summer So Far

This girl, she was annoyed that she couldn't blow bubbles and her sisters could. So armed with a mirror and two pieces of gum, she set about learning. Now she is a pro-bubbler.

This week we went out looking for new flip-flops for the girls. Shekinah does better with a larger pair that are cut down. She needs more space in front of the toes. I needed to pad the toe area this time and then add some flowers to hide the padding. We'll see if they last for the summer.

Most of summer vacation we've been seeing this, but last night I had a pleasant surprise...

I saw this...

He made supper and cleaned up his dirty dishes! 

This is what we do for entertainment at our house....watch the creamer settle in daddy's coffee. It makes all sorts of interesting swirls